The military lifestyle is nomadic by nature. Military families move on average once every two-to-three years.
And, while we readily thank active military personnel for the many sacrifices they make, and we frequently remember to thank their spouses, too, we too often forget the children.
With a new school year about to begin in New Jersey, this is a good time to remember that military children must overcome unique and significant challenges. These include enduring family separation while a parent is deployed for long periods of time and navigating new schools and trying to make new friends every few years.
This following letter from a 10-year-old makes clear how challenging life is for a military child.
This letter was originally published by the United Service Organizations as part of the USO Military Kid Creative Showcase, an effort to feature the individual experiences of military children.
— Ray Zardetto
As a military child, I have been forced to move a lot, and I will be forced to move this summer to Mississippi.
I know what it is like firsthand to always be packing and moving. It is difficult. Being a military child is already incredibly stressful. You are always worried and frustrated about moving. I believe it should be up to the service members and their children to decide if they move and where they move to.
Military kids should not be forced to move as often as we must, because they do not get to keep their friends.
Losing friends is upsetting, and moving every couple of years makes it hard to keep friends. It is unfair, because we do not get to hang out with our friends and do not usually see them again because we have moved so far away from each other.
Normally, as a ‘military brat,’ you do not stay in contact with your friends, you make at your parent’s duty station because you are too young to have a phone. Having long-term friends as a military kid is not possible, because you are always on the go.
Another reason military kids should not move is because you are always changing schools.
I am 10 years old, and I have been to four different elementary schools. It is very scary to have to go to a new school, especially in the middle of a school year.
It’s always frightening to go to a new school because you never know if the staff are going to be nice. You are always forced to meet new people — and they do not always know what it’s like being a military kid.
Adapting to schools and not always having understanding from the school staff makes a massive impact on military students academically. You do not always get to finish the school year, and that really makes it hard because you know you may be leaving a good school and going to another one that is not as good.
Also, another big reason military children should not be forced to move is because you do not have a permanent home. We move every four to five years.
That makes it difficult to call somewhere home because you are never somewhere long enough. I was born in Kansas, but now live in Texas, and soon will be moving to Mississippi.
I have never lived anywhere long enough to call it home. Military children move three times more than their civilian peers. Military children are stressed due to not having a place to call home and always being moved around.
Being a military brat is hard and frustrating. Moving makes it even more difficult because you never feel settled. Having no say is challenging because you never have a choice on where or when you are moving.
You are never near family and, one day, I hope we get stationed closer to my family. Military kids should have a say on whether they move or not because we are affected by moving and what station we end up at.
