Lucy Del Gaudio is a U.S. Army veteran of eight years (1990-1998). She survived a sexual assault committed against her while she was in the service.
Del Gaudio became a vocal advocate for women in the military and women veterans following her transition to civilian life, spurred on by her own experience and by the murder of Private First-Class Venessa Guillen at Fort Hood, Texas in 1992 (see accompanying sidebar).
Del Gaudio has testified in front of the House Armed Services Committee and was appointed by Governor Phil Murphy to the NJ Commission for Women Veterans and also appointed to the Workgroup for Sexual Harassment /Sexual Assault by Veterans Affairs Secretary Dennis McDonough.
Today she works for YWCA Northern New Jersey’s Operation Sisterhood, a program focused on creating a safety net for female veterans as they return to civilian life.
In the first of a two-part interview, Del Gaudio discusses her struggles with PTSD following her military service, the sexual assault she endured and how the Vanessa Guillen case prompted her to become the advocate she is today.
Part Two of the interview will appear in the next issue of Military Matters on August 13.
MM: When did you serve in the military?
Del Gaudio (DG): My service years in the army were 1990 to 1998. I did active and reserve. The majority of my active service was done in Germany. My reserve service was at Fort Totten, Queens.
MM: When you enlisted, did you see the military as a long-term career?
DG: I really wanted to make the military a career. Both of my brothers were serving when I joined. My elder brother was my recruiter.
MM: You were a victim of sexual assault during your service. Is that what prompted you to retire after eight years rather than making it a career?
DG: My decision to leave was based on my experience and my sexual assault. That was my key trigger. I knew the mechanism of the military – the way they were treating women who had experienced sexual assault.
It was a very gaslighting and uncomfortable situation. So, for me, my thinking was let me fulfill my contract and then let me get the hell out of here.
MM: When the sexual assault occurred, did you report it?
DG: My sexual assault was done by someone in my chain of command. I did report it. I was the unit clerk, so I did everything very much by the book. Once I reported it, I started seeing slowly but surely what was happening.
There was one day when they told me I did not have privileges to go into certain records. That was when I knew they were going to completely sweep this one under the rug.
Galvanizing a Movement: The Vanessa Guillen Story
Vanessa Guillen was born in Houston in 1999. In June 2018 she enlisted in the U.S. Army, fulfilling a pledge she had made to herself as a young girl.
Gullen was stationed at Fort Hood in Texas.
In the spring of 2022, she disappeared, having last been seen on April 22 in a parking lot of the regimental headquarters where she worked.
In the weeks prior to her disappearance, she had confided in family members that she had been sexually harassed by a superior. Guillen told her family she had decided not to report the incidents for fear of retaliation.
For more than two months following her disappearance, the Guillen family tried to get information about the army’s investigation with little success. When the Guillen family went public with their frustrations and accusations of coverup, activists and the news media became involved, turning the Guillen investigation into a national story.
The media interest was heavy because there had already been a large number of sexually related assaults reported at Fort Hood and a number of soldiers had disappeared there.
On June 30, human remains later identified as those of Gullen’s were found.
Investigators zeroed in on army specialist Aaron Robinson who had been of the last people to see Guillen alive. Robinson became their target after they spoke with his girlfriend Cecily Aguilar, and she acknowledged he had confessed Gullen’s murder to her.
On July 1, as authorities closed in on Robinson, he shot himself to death. Aguilar was later convicted of helping him dispose of Guillen’s remains.
Robinson’s reported motive for murdering Guillen – as told by Aguilar – was not directly related to sexual assault. Guillen had seen Aguilar’s photo on Robinson’s mobile phone and because Aguilar was married to another soldier at the time, it was a violation of the army’s fraternization rules for Robinson to be dating her. Robinson was afraid Guillen might reveal the affair.
More than a dozen officials at Fort Hood were disciplined over this case and one of the gates at the fort was named in Guillen’s honor.
A social media platform was created under the hashtag “I am Vanessa Guillen” and it was used by dozens of military members to share their stories of sexual harassment and assault.
A Netflix documentary about the Gullen case was dropped in 2022 and is still available for viewing. Del Gaudio is one of the subjects interviewed for the film.
On June 20, 2021, the Vanessa Guillen Act was signed into law by Texas Governor Greg Abbott. The law allows for military members to report sexual harassment or assault outside of the chain of command in order to protect them from retaliation.
Later that year, President Joseph Biden signed the National Defense Authorization Act which codified the procedure that sexual harassment and assault would be reported outside the military chain of command. The act also instituted protections against retaliation for those reporting such assaults.
MM: In addition to your own experience, one of the turning points for you in your becoming an advocate for women veterans was the case of Vanessa Guillen, a soldier murdered at Fort Hood in Texas. Talk about that case.
DG: The murder of Vanessa Guillen really opened the eyes of the nation into what was going on with sexual harassment in the military.
People knew it was taking place because in 1992 we had the tailhook scandal, but that was kind of swept under the rug. With Vanessa Guillen, it was a different deal because of the climate at the time. I was asked to testify in 2020 in front of the military personnel committee.
Melissa Brown, who was a former captain in the army, and I testified and called for action in the investigation of Fort Hood. Our testimony had a lot of suggestions that became part of the Vanessa Guillen Act. One is that the reporting mechanism [for sexual harassment] is now outside the chain of command.
MM: Is there any guidance for women entering the military regarding situations such as what you experienced?
DG: No, it doesn’t exist. I can’t tell you how many people I know have called me and asked if I would talk to a young woman who is thinking of joining the military.
Look, there are people that have come out of the military with no issue whatsoever. But there are individuals who have had these negative experiences. I tell them to go in with your eyes wide open and just be prepared that something could happen to you.
Go in knowing the possibilities.
MM: Would you say sexual assault in the military is still rampant?
DG: It is still rampant.
I experienced the racial slurs and the sexual innuendos, then the harassment and then the assault.
I don’t blame the military so much because you don’t know what kind of person is joining. But I think what happens is they foster a mentality where things get problematic.
I had some wonderful commanders and wonderful experiences in my service that I am very proud of, but that one instance of sex assault made it negative for me.
Also, there have been a number of men that have been harassed and sexually assaulted but nine times out of ten with a man, they call it hazing.
MM: How does your family react to the work you do?
DG: I am blessed that I have a very supportive family – I have four children and one grandchild. I have a very supportive husband – he is a wonderful human being – David Del Gaudio.
We are married 18 years. He was one of the first people who knew something was wrong with me. I started experiencing these panic attacks and I went to the hospital, and they thought I had a heart attack.
They did the work-up and said there is nothing wrong with you. He was the one who stopped the physician’s assistant and said ‘my wife served in the military, and I think something happened to her.’ That is when they diagnosed me with PTSD.
MM: Have the effects of the assault committed against you dissipated at all?
DG: I don’t know about whether it dissipates but I have my moments.
I took a break from sexual assault and harassment advocacy because I did not realize how much it was affecting me. I had to take a step back and not be so involved for my own self-preservation.
I need to take care of myself because it is really hard work when you advocate in this space and you never know what is going to trigger you.
I have PTSD and I am not ashamed to say I have it, so there are certain conversations where people have asked me if I can do something and I have said no because of the subject matter or just because of my own personal feelings.
PTSD is a weird thing that happens. I never know which Lucy is going to wake up in the morning – is it going to be Lucy who is incredibly functional like I am today and willing to participate in conversations like this, or sometimes that Lucy wakes up and does not want to get out of bed and I am struggling because I feel a certain way, or I watched something, or I heard something that is just not making sense to me.
In Part Two of the interview with Lucy Del Gaudio in the next issue of Military Matters, Del Gaudio will discuss how she came out of her shell following her service to become a vocal advocate, the many needs of women veterans that are not being met, and her ongoing frustrations with the Veterans Administration.
